Futures Past: Off-brand brick set retro junk spaceship!

 

As I'm writing this, I've realized I'm at a milestone: There's more of a backlog of toys and collectibles I've been meaning to write about than there is for movie reviews or fiction. So, I decided to try to get something out of the way that's been backlogged a while. Over the last few months, I've made several ill-advised purchases of building sets and toys, both old and new (see the Bristle Blocks). Here's the one that's ended up using up the most time, a set I purchased with the promise that it could assemble into a space station thingy. Here's a few more pics of the glorious packaging... which actually is pretty good.

For the backstory, I ordered this at the end of last month after another, entirely disappointing purchase as a 1980s-retro spaceship/ space station/ thingy. It was a consideration that certain elements resembled my still-mutating designs for the Neptune-ship Janus conceived for the Space Guys adventure. I ordered it for a ludicrously low price that actually went down a little more after my order was in. It was advertised as a set that could be assembled as smaller ships then assembled mecha-combiner style into something vaguely resembling either a space station or a long-haul starship. What I didn't expect was that they came in a carton with eight individual boxes, as if this was planned to go to stores as cases of sets for kids to collect. What interested me was that it was pretty easy to arrange these end to end, which really came closer to a "realistic" design. Here are a few of my initial experiments, on a set of shelves I just recently assembled. Yes, those are the Truckstop Queen and the Evil Space Guys.

I took long enough assembling these that I had already tried several variations of the ship before I had assembled the last of them. Initially, I tried to modify some of these, particularly a module with a radar/ satellite dish attached, which is "supposed" to orient with the dish sideways. There were a couple that just don't fit in. One of them is the space shuttle, which simply doesn't look on scale, especially in comparison to the "gravity ring" segment, which would be at least 20-30 meters wide if it is what it looks like. The other is a particularly awkward satellite/ probe thingy, which doesn't look much different from the rest. When assembled, however, its individual sections are prone to rotating in different directions. It's also almost impossible to keep on a stand. Here are closeups of the offending ships.

After a few days of experimentation, the ideal configuration that emerged was 5 or 6 "modules", with what I think of as the wing ship up front, the ring towards the back, and the fattest segment around the middle. I settled on removing the nose of one ship to make the connections easier. I also had to deal with the fact that the front of the fat one wasn't properly moored to anything else. Here's the "ideal" ship, which is something like 2-2 1/2 feet long. (Oh, and there's the packaged Spiff ship...)

And here's the winged ship and the one I modified in original configuration. The latter has an ingenious sort of hangar bay and a raising satellite dish, which naturally jam or come loose with any amount of handling.

And here's the ring. It's worth further note that the instructions usually show this perpendicular to the central axis, exactly where it would make the least sense.

Now for the fun part, in the course of this post, I finally broke up the  wonkiest ship for extra parts. It was enough for an extra mini-module and several stabilized connections. Here is my upgraded ship, viewed from the other side.

All in all, this is a very good set for basically nothing. It has just the right combination of "retro" and realistic. The crowning irony is that ships that look like collections of junk were always the closest to real life. I am choosing not to link to where to buy it, mainly because there are a few different sources out there. Do comparison shop a little, because I've seen at least one listing for twice the price I paid, which is not worth it. To rap this up, here's one more shot of the shelves. Hello, giant Predator! And the City Predator! And Connie...

That's all for now, more to come!

Movie Mania: Lanard Alien/ predator returns!

 

In the course of running this blog, one common denominator is that when I do get something new that I choose to cover here, it's completely up in the air how soon I will get to it. Usually, this doesn't have much bearing on what I do in the meantime, particularly given my disregard for keeping things in the packaging. Once in a while, though, I have held off any permanent action until I can properly document. For this post, I have something I waited on longer than usual, from a line that has provided a non-trivial chunk of my posts. Here is one more unboxing from the Lanard Alien/ Predator line!

As previously recounted, this all started with a direct-to-Walmart release by Lanard Toys, already on my radar for the Primal Clash megafauna, that was actually licensed as tie-in merchandise for the Alien/ Aliens franchise. I first covered this line for the colossal kaiju Alien Queen, and later covered an earlier Alien haul that accounted for most of the line. The line returned with a series of larger-scale 7-inch figures that also included Predator entries. Because of limited availability, I only got one of the Predator figures (plus the insane 12-inch Predator). My interest dropped off after I got the excellent Aliens-style figure. A while later, I found the one I had missed, a Predator clearly based on the first movie. I held onto it in the box for a long time, not because I cared about collector value (really, in the time it takes for the real market to emerge, there's going to be more of these things in the box than out of it), but because I didn't want to unbox without documenting immediately. This week, I finally got to it, and still ended up taking a few days to get to it. Here's a few pics from the unboxing.

Also, here's the interior packaging, demonstrating the usual standards of unnecessary detail.

As you can see, this is intended to be the half-cloaked Predator. Ironically, it's painted with a little more detail than other figures, which skimped on the forearms and the mesh. Here, you can differentiate the forearm shield and the wrist nuke from the flesh tones of the elbows. There's also some sense of texturing behind the netting stuff. It looks like there would be more detail on the back. Of course, I had to take it out of the box to confirm they skimped on that big-time. Here's some pics.

What's worse, that the joints can bend this way, or that this worked better than anything else I tried?

If it bleeds, we can sell it health insurance...

And here's one more pic with the City Predator. Can we just say the second movie is better... kiiiind of?

"Hey, at least I stabbed more humans than I shot with the plasma bazooka!"

And one more! By the way, the accessory is something that only appears in Predator 2. And wow, those claws are long.

And while I'm at it, here's a round of bonus pics of the Aliens. I tried to use more of their articulation, but I could still barely make them look threatening. In place of the ladies, I brought in the Marx astronauts and Evil Space Guys. The scale works disconcertingly well (see also the Aliens APC). It gives me a vibe of a throwback to the pulps and B movies Alien ripped off.

"No, actually, I don't want to know what's in that bag..."

"Are you sure you don't want to see a mysterious empty starship?"

"See, this never works when we have guns..."

"Yeah, well, what else are you going to do if you're in outer space and you need to slice a pie?"

"You're telling me pink doesn't work???"

And how about a lineup with real lighting?

"Okay, the sportsman code means you don't use the gun.... uh, right???"

With that, it's the end of one more chapter for this blog and for me, at least unless more of these come out. It was indeed a good run, and it's safe to bet there will be more ahead from Lanard. That's all for now, more to come!

Retrobots Revisited: Changeables Gen 2!

 

It's my day off on the last week of an "off" month, and I've been trying to work ahead a bit. For the post today, I have another bot lineup, following up on what seems to have been my last installment of this feature, the McDonalds Changeables. Since that post, I made a couple orders adding to my collection, from later releases I consciously declined to pick up back when. Here's the first pic of the lineup including one we met last time, all based on vintage packaging that's probably being collected on some far-off planet (all that just to reference my review of The Hidden).

Of this lot, the one featured before is the first-wave McNuggets bot. The others are supposed to be a very similar sandwich box marked Quarter Pounder, and a pancake box that obviously isn't disguised from all angles. It's noteworthy that, where both Transformers and its rivals and competitors often took these shortcuts, this is the only Changeable to do so, thus one more reason they're awesome. Here's the group transformed. The McNuggets is cool as always, the flapjack box is silly, but the Quarter Pounder is just... not... right.

Needless to say, it was the sandwich-box bot that got me interested in expanding my collection. What makes him and other "G2" bots different is that there's a lot more detail painted on, which in turn makes it more difficult to find them in good condition. The Quarter Pounder in particular is prone to wear on the outer box detail and the face; the one I finally got is in moderately good condition. On close examination, I found some streaks on the inside that must have worn off during "transformations", and quickly concluded the only good option is to leave him in bot mode. And that face... dear Logos, the face... You can only appreciate it in closeup.

"Have I told you how I got these scars?"

Something I realized as I did further research was that two of my figures, the Fries and the Big Mac, were G2 figures, released with different colors. This incidentally explained why the Fry bot's fists are visible when he's not transformed; originally it was all red anyway. It also accounted for a vague memory of what I took as the original Quarter Pounder on the Happy Meal boxes, as it turned out both originally had the same yellow/ blue colors. Since many of the online offers included duplicates, I looked into getting a G1 figure for comparison. I didn't care for the prices, but I did end up with an extra Big Mac in better condition. I noticed after posting this, there's a further, minor difference in the molding of the lettuce, which is completely gratuitous compared to the expense of multiple molds. Here they are with the G1 Quarter Pounder; even in the pic, I can tell the one on the right is the one I already had.

Something else I confirmed in my research is that I had already sort of had a G2 bot, in the form of a 3rd wave of transforming toys that became dinos instead of bots. Here's a lineup of that one with the Fry and Shake bots. You can see the extra detail on the Fry bot's face, which is solid, deep blue in G1. I also determined that the Shake bot's red/ blue detail is painted on, something I initially thought was unique but then confirmed on the McNuggets bot.

And here's a closeup of the dino.

And last and probably least, here's a couple burger-based Transformers. The first is one I'm sure I held in my hand in the second-hand stores back in the day, which the extra Big Mac bot came with. The other is another dino, clearly based on the Big Mac bot but definitely of separate origin. The Cheeseburger bot has a kind of charm, but definitely doesn't measure up to G1. The dino is just weird.

"I have no mouth, and I must siiiiiing..."

And for something different, here's one that got away. Something I had already confirmed is that the Shake bot was replaced by a completely different design in G2, which was wonky even compared to the flapjack bot. But then I found a listing for this, by a seller in Australia. It looks like a repaint/ upgrade of the G1 bot, except this time, there's clearly a new faceplate. I didn't get it because of the price, including a big hit on shipping, and I haven't seen any independent confirmation of its provenance. For now, it must remain a mystery. And wow, that face...

And to wind things up, a couple reference model pics. First, Connie and Cassie, back on the stand. I got out the purse from the box the Trailer Park Princess came in, and Cass has been rocking it.

"I don't know, maybe I should give King Kong another chance. But what would we have for dinner?..."

And as an extra project I might get back to, I've been testing out the articulation on the Lanard large Alien figures to see if I can get a pose that's actually threatening. This is the best so far...

"Wait a minute, we're robots... but we're disguised as something it can eat???"

That's all for now, more to come!

Revenge of the Revenant Review 29: The one with Mexican wrestlers vs. zombies in a helicopter

 

Title: Invasion of the Dead aka Invasion of Death

What Year?: 1973

Classification: Unnatural Experiment/ Anachronistic Outlier

Rating: It’s Okay! (3/4)

 

With this review, I’m in the final countdown for this feature, and I already know I’m going to end up going way over sooner or later. Under the circumstances, I might as well go with a first, a movie I only watched specifically for the present review. It also marks the first time I’ve reviewed a foreign-language film without an English dub, and on top of that, the first representation of a subgenre that simply never caught on in the US. That’s as good a point to dive into Invasion of the Dead, a relatively late example of the Mexican wrestling movie genre… and if you’re wondering what this could possibly have to do with zombies, you lucky bastard.

Our story begins with a monologue about the vastness and indifference or active hostility of the cosmos that makes Criswell in Plan 9 From Outer Space look remotely sane. Also, If you’re watching this under the circumstances of this review, you’re going to be hearing this in Spanish with English subtitles superimposed over other subtitles. In short order, we’re introduced to the Blue Demon and Professor Zovek, two real-life Mexican folk performers who in this cinematic alternate universe are called upon by the police and other authorities to investigate a mysterious meteorite that crashes in what looks like northern Mexico. (Knowing anything about Latin American geography is not going to help…) Naturally, it turns out the meteor is the center of an entity or force able to reanimate the dead. But these aren’t your ordinary shambling cannibals, but cunning and ornery attackers who can plan ambushes, hide between rampages, and even hijack a helicopter, all directed by the malign cosmic power of the matte-black orb. Can Zovek and Blue Demon save the day, or will the zombies’ air superiority win the day?

Invasion of the Dead was a film from the egregious Mexican filmmaker Rene Cardona, featuring Mexican lucha libre star Blue Demon and daredevil Professor Zovek. It was one of an estimated 25 horror/ fantasy films to feature the Blue Demon in the 1960s and 1970s. The film was reportedly planned as a sequel to Zovek’s 1972 debut film The Incredible Professor Zovek, then completed as a Blue Demon adventure after he died in an unrelated accident during filming.  German model/ actress Christa Linder appeared as Erika, the daughter of a scientist who becomes zombified. Limited information exists on the contemporary release or later distribution of the film. An English-language poster with the liberally transliterated title Invasion of Death appears to have been created for US/ North American distribution, but does not include a copyright or MPAA rating. While the film has reportedly been released on Spanish-language DVDs., it remains inaccessible for US audiences except through online videos, possibly based on European VHS recordings.

For my experiences, I heard of this one as usual from Dendle’s Zombie Movie Encyclopedia. Even that dedicated scholar of the genre describes it with astonishment and every sign of awe. I looked into it on and off, and considered it for this feature. I was finally and reluctantly ready to set it aside as I planned out the reviews that would bring the count up to 30 reviews. In the middle of it all, I gave it a go to fill a little time. It turned out that the video that was easiest to find was a video of bootleg-quality resolution with German subtitles that must have come with the source recording. (I know just enough Spanish to be dangerous.) It was the strangest and somehow most fitting viewing experience I had had for this feature since Horror Express. That alone was enough to convince me that the lineup wouldn’t be complete without this one. So, I set aside an entry from a popular series aside to review it. I’m going to dry to do this quickly because it’s getting late and again, too much analysis isn’t going to help matters.

Going in, the strangest part of this movie is simply that its assumed world is taken completely at face value. We have Zovek, a sort of hippie hunk, following Erika and her father where armed soldiers and police have already vanished. Even more surreally, we see the Blue Demon wear his mask without comment while solemnly consulting with various authorities and even examining evidence at his own proto-CSI lab. Things get still more curious when they do battle with the undead. Zovek manages to grapple with small groups of the revenants, before spending most of the final act running from their impressive numbers. By comparison, the Blue Demon mostly faces limited numbers of opponents, including several goons in vaguely ape-like stock makeup. His main fighting technique proves to be a sort of slap that usually stuns or disables individual attackers before they can gang up on him. Again, the odd part is that this is done with utmost seriousness. These are revenants that clearly aim to kill, and the protagonists react accordingly.

That leaves the zombies themselves. In appearance, these are even more no-tech than Sole Survivor, and almost as malevolent. Like many of the more creative zombies, they don’t appear cannibalistic, nor is it entirely clear that their condition is contagious. There’s old-school horror shots of the first wave rising from the graves (a conceit that George Romero moved the genre away from), and a mist-shrouded, eerily-lit cavern or quarry where they congregate. At the same time, they freely congregate in broad daylight in perhaps the film’s most impressive sequences, which must have been filmed about the same time Romero brought us the fully-lit hordes of The Crazies.  By comparison, the spark-throwing meteorite that gives them life never quite comes into its own, all the more unfortunate given the unearthly shots of the pit. There’s an extra pile of random in their seeming fascination with vehicles, which only comes up again in City of the Walking Dead. It supplies the most unique moments of the movie, yet to me doesn’t offer a lot for further comment. The ones I will give mention are a scene where Erika’s father collapses, drawing the protagonists to land the helicopter, and an entirely inexplicable moment where they are actually picked up by what proves to be a zombified driver.

In all this, you might be thinking I would be at a loss for the “one scene”. In fact, after a little more time than usual to think this through, I quickly came back to one sequence in particular, unlike many featuring the Blue Demon rather than Zovek.  A little past the one-hour mark (in a 78-minute movie), we see a power surge from the meteor, and a trio of soldiers who fell victim to an earlier attack rise to their feet. Meanwhile, Blue Demon and his sidekick lose their car to a zombie who actually runs over the sidekick (and yes, it does not look fake). While Blue Demon and his injured companion are recovering from the shock, the soldiers approach. The wrestler looks up from dealing with one of the undead, and freezes. The part that embeds it in my mind is a series of closeups of each soldier’s face. None of them have more than a trickle of blood from their wounds, and all share the same utterly blank expression. It all leads into a decent fight sequence, but in a common theme, nothing beats the unsettling tableau of the zombies just staring before the strike.

In conclusion, all I have left to say is a comment on the rating, except I find myself wavering on whether there’s anything to say. Of course, there are far better movies in and out of the genre. Of course, it makes almost no sense. Of course, the production values are terrible. Of course, its whole genre niche is incomprehensible for any other time or place. Yet, it remains well-shot, unaccountably ahead of its time, and more genuinely entertaining than plenty of those “better” movies. That’s enough to stir up at least the quality of mercy in me, and that’s enough to give this one a passing grade.

Mid-Sized Marx: Return of the 3 inch space guys!

 

I was planning on one toy blog post for this week, in between movie reviews, and I reminded myself I had one particular acquisition backlogged. Quite a while ago, I introduced the 3 inch Marx space guys, including The Space Guy Who Doesn't Care. At the time, I knew I was well short of a complete set, but the ones still out there didn't interest me enough to shell out for the rest. About a month ago, however, I found a full set for a good enough price that I put in an order. Here's the lineup, starting with the figure that interested me most.

"You're saying the Prime Directive violates the principle of observer effect and basic ethics?"

It should be pretty obvious why I like this guy. One look at pics of this sculpt immediately made me think Captain Kirk. The pose, the facial expression, the wonky phone-thingy, all are perfect for Star Trek. I wouldn't seriously suggest that this somehow influenced the show, but it does make it clear that a lot of things about it were already very much part of the visual vocabulary of science fiction. In fact, the undoubted common source was the Tom Corbett TV series and comics, which Marx originally licensed in the early to mid-1950's and continued to recycle well after they stopped paying for the rights or otherwise acknowledging the source. Given this background, Trek was if anything more respectful to this and other earlier properties than the Marx staff who were directly involved. Meanwhile, here's the next pose in the lineup, and it's... odd.

"Why can't they make this suit unzip from the bottom?"

To be blunt, the pose and expression look like this guy is either in sheer terror or trying to find whatever functions as the space toilet. Still, it's reasonably intriguing, which is more than can be said for this guy, literall a major reason I did not want to pay for a full set. Beyond being clearly based on a TV aerial, I have no idea what this thing is supposed to be, and I don't care.

"With this, I bet we could pick up 20, even 30 channels!"

Things are looking up with the next pair. One is a space guy with a rifle that I already had in a silver color different from the rest. The other is a sort of wonky robot or alien; theories differ whether he's the enemy or on the space guys' side. What I was surprised to discover is that he's definitely sculpted as wearing trousers, with enough detail that I'm a little wary of showing the back. What would be underneath is anyone's guess.

Then there are the duplicates to the ones I already had, which are often the most intriguing. This time around,  there were no big surprises. For the most part, the plastic looks the same, except for the robot and the rifle guy, which have a sort of milky, almost but not quite translucent texture. For further distinctions, the copies I previously got had some kind of pink staining that I can pick out, while the new group have a bit more "flash" around the edges. The big difference is that I now have a full set of helmets. I remain unimpressed by these, though I'm sure the quality of this batch hasn't helped. They're easily smudged, several seem to have pitting or air pockets, and as an extra annoyance, there's some residue of what looks like very fine-grained glitter. (Of course, I hate glitter.) Fitting the helmets proved a bit random. With some figures, they barely fit even when I tried multiple copies, especially the Space Guy Who Doesn't Care. With others, they lock down well enough that I can pick on the whole figure just by gripping the helmet. The big surprise was that the best and most consistent fit by far is the silver rifle guy, which makes me think he's closest to the originals in the molding and plastic. Here's a line-up of the duplicates, and a close-up.

"Okay, I'll do you if you do me..."

"And we're walking, and we're walking..."

"Do you know what this is?"

And while I'm at it, a lineup with the Aliens APC!

"We got nukes, we got knives, we got... a thermometer?"

With that, I'm wrapping this up. I have been debating a few more pics, but I think I've covered this well enough, and I have enough other things backlogged that I can fit in the guys later. That's all for now, more to come!