Featured Creature: The one that remade Steve McQueen

 

Title: The Blob

What Year?: 1988

Classification: Weird Sequel/ Irreproducible Oddity

Rating: It’s Okay! (3/4)

 

As I write this, I’m into the final stretch of my Halloween lineup, and I was definitely ready for more entries in this feature in particular. As it happens, what I came up with included another 1980s-‘90s remake, following my review of the 1990 version of Night of the Living Dead, which got me thinking semi-seriously about the possibilities of a full-fledged lineup. I don’t see that in the cards, in part because some of the best examples are ones I’ve already reviewed (see for example Invaders From Mars). Still, two in a row is something, and a good further indicator of how good the vintage remake wave could be. I present The Blob, 1980s version, and it is so much better.

Our story begins with a small town, some assorted teen angst, and a falling star. Soon, the focus shifts to a cheerleader, her date, and a long-haired biker who seems to be trying to rebel without actually attracting attention to himself. When the trio discover a hobo attacked by a fist-sized mass of pink slime, they rush him to the hospital. Alas, by the time the inattentive doctors get to the victim, the ooze had consumed him and makes short work of the would-be boyfriend. The cheerleader and the biker try to warn the town, while the slime continues to grow in size. Meanwhile, a group of government agents in biohazard suits arrive, quickly placing the town under quarantine. It’s up to the two youths to stop the creature and save the town. But will the cheerleader’s little brother be the next victim?

The Blob was a 1988 remake of the 1958 Steve McQueen film of the same name. The film was produced by Chuck Russell, from a script cowritten with Frank Darabont. The lead roles of Brian and Meg were given to Kevin Dillon and Shawnee Smith, then roughly 23 and 19, with Joe Seneca as the agent Meddows and Paul McCrane of RoboCop as Deputy Briggs. Extensive effects were provided by a team led by Tony Gardner, who went on to work in films such as Darkman, Army of Darkness and Batman And Robin. (Can’t win them all…) The movie was filmed beginning in early 1988, and released by TriStar in August of the same year. It was judged a commercial failure, with a box office of $8.2 million against an estimated $10M budget. The film received fair to good reviews from contemporary and later fans and critics, with some making favorable comparisons to the original. It has received multiple home video releases, including Blu Ray releases in 2014 and 2019.

For my personal experiences, this was a movie I first looked up right after I started Netflix. To my further recollection, I requested it and the original and watched both in one night. I vividly remember the first one as simply unwatchable, with Steve McQueen being out of place in his role and everyone else being painfully inept. By comparison, the remake was a riproaring ‘80s monster movie, not just for its effects but a quite good cast who generally look the right age for their roles. I’ve come back to it regularly as a genuine favorite, but have never given that much thought to it as review material. This is the kind of movie that goes over my radar. It’s remained readily available. It’s well-regarded among anyone who would appreciate this kind of movie at all. If it comes to that, it really didn’t even do that badly at the box office, to the extent that it earned back 4/5ths of its official budget where plenty of far more expensive movies (see Memoirsof an Invisible Man) didn’t even get halfway.

Moving to the movie itself, the thing that inevitably dominates discussion is the effects. This is where the movie is truly irreproducible. If it had been made much later, there would inevitably have been pressure to use CGI, which I personally think could at least have worked better when the medium was at the stylized level of The Abyss and Terminator 2. The real “problem” is that this would have cost enough to transform it into a “high profile” release, which as we shall see is not what the movie was or should have been. On consideration, it’s debatable whether it would have worked much earlier. The inarguable greatest strength of the effects and the movie itself is that the creature effects are either “practical” rigs that can interact directly with the cast or done artfully enough to look like they are part of the live-action frame. To achieve such results, especially on this movie’s budget, was something the effects guys had been working toward well into the ‘80s golden age. This is also as good a point as any to mention the violence/ gore, really almost free of blood. The body horror here reached an abstract level rarely approached (only Splinter comes readily to mind), with bodies violently mutilated like Briggs/ McCrane and a hapless handyman, or transformed beyond recognition like an ill-fated projectionist.

This all easily overshadows the characters and story. This is something where the movie sets itself up, drawing heavily on cliches both new and old. This contributes to a weak opening act, complete with a tiresome urban legend and a lover’s lane kill. In my estimation, things start to click with the scene in a hospital, which offers a relatively early take on realities that are now all too familiar. What’s most intriguing is that the still-small blob actually displays a degree of intelligence and stealth, enough to take advantage of the stupidity and indifference of human society. I have always been a little disappointed that the tensions and  satirical possibilities of these early aren’t explored in the rest of the movie. Fortunately, it does give nuance to the main characters that will pay off, and even a sympathetic angle on the skeptical authority figures. The movie quickly gets in gear, and from there is only slowed down by the overdone coverup subplot. By the time the blob reaches the movie theater, the movie is running on adrenaline and nihilism, except that we can relate well enough to the cheerleader and her kid brother as they run for it.

Now it’s time for the “one scene”, and there’s one that’s been off the charts since I first heard of the movie. In the midst of the blob’s attack on the diner, a not-quite matronly waitress runs off on her own. She makes her way to a phone booth, of the kind the Christopher Reeve Superman movies acknowledged were getting irrelevant. She has the sense to dial the sheriff, who has been her maybe love interest. By the time she gets through, the blob has surrounded the phone booth and begun probing the openings. It’s incredibly intense and claustrophobic, augmented but not driven by an impressive display of effects. What’s most interesting on that front is that there’s a sense of the blob’s limitations; it may act like a fluid, but it’s subject to viscosity and a sort of surface tension that slows down its advance. The line goes dead, just before the waitress and the viewer sees exactly what has become of the sheriff. It’s the last straw of despair that sets the tone of the scene, even before the booth gives literally all at once, with one last pitiful glimpse of a mop of hair in the midst of the swirling slime.

In conclusion, all I can say is that I really don’t have any more to say. I suppose it might seem like I’m being a little hard on this one. To me, this is in acknowledgment of its flaws, as well as the simple fact that it’s not quite up to the standards of the very best 1980s-‘90s remakes, notably The Thing and Night of the Living Dead. With further hindsight, this is a film whose legacy is what it should have been, a “classic” in its right but still a “minor” one. For a film made at a high point for the genre and the effects profession, 2^nd tier is more than good enough. I for one am happy enough to have reviewed a good movie, because oh boy, have I  seen a lot of the other kind.

Image credit VHS Openings Wiki.